


close enough to see

by cityofflights



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: 5+1 Things, Attempt at Humor, Bartenders, Fluff, M/M, POV Outsider, and i love fred, fred loves barisi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:41:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27550189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cityofflights/pseuds/cityofflights
Summary: "Fredrick liked being a bartender. It wasn’t exactly what he dreamed of doing when he was a little kid, filling out those mandatory “what do I want to do when I grow up” essays. No, at the time his biggest aspirations had been to be rich and buy the biggest house in the whole world and fill it with all the dogs he could find on the streets. Unfortunately, those plans had to be put on hold for a while, but being a bartender was a replacement he could live with."Fred is a bartender at Forlini's. These are 5 times he noticed barisi plus the one time they noticed him
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.
Comments: 19
Kudos: 84





	close enough to see

**Author's Note:**

> a while ago someone tweeted about barisi but from the forlini's bartender pov and well...this happened
> 
> all titles are quotes from the poem "Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out" by Richard Siken

**_Every morning another chapter where the hero shifts_ **

Fredrick liked being a bartender. It wasn’t exactly what he dreamed of doing when he was a little kid, filling out those mandatory “ _ what do I want to do when I grow up _ ” essays. No, at the time his biggest aspirations had been to be rich and buy the biggest house in the whole world and fill it with all the dogs he could find on the streets. Unfortunately, those plans had to be put on hold for a while, but being a bartender was a replacement he could live with.

Working at a place like Forlini’s always allowed him to hear the craziest stories cops, lawyers, and everything in between had to offer as it was a usual hang out spot for them. As every bartender, Fredrick had his favorite customers, those who would tip a little more, engaging in small talk while he prepared their drinks making him feel more like a human and less like a disposable alcohol dispenser. Among that group, there was what he had come to call “ _ SVU Gang _ ”, it wasn’t the most creative name but no one else other than him would ever hear it so it wasn’t an issue.

The SVU Gang was composed of 4 cops and a lawyer, their assigned ADA. He could recite their names as if they were long-dated friends instead of clients at the bar. Sargent Benson who always reminded Fred of his mom with her calm voice and caring eyes, Detective Amaro who despite being polite looked angry at something most of the times, Detective Rollins who never let the fact that Fredrick wasn’t into women deter her from flirting with him and amused him endlessly, Detective Tutuola who was usually quiet when retrieving drinks but always asked how school was going before returning to his seat and his possible favorite element (for totally platonic reasons, he made sure to add every time), ADA Rafael Barba, who looked tired even when he was happy which always made Fredrick a bit sad.

He was deeply familiarized with their routines and with their orders, although only one of those was an actual job requirement, so when suddenly the 3 beers that accompanied the scotch and glass of Cabernet turned into 4 beers he noticed. 

Detective Carisi, or Sonny as the man insisted to be called, was what could only be described as a giant puppy turned human. He was affable, always with a smile on his face, ready to help whoever may need it. Fred thought he was a great addition to the SVU Gang because as much as their job was very important and serious, they really needed to learn how to relax every once in a while. But he could see the remaining members of the group didn’t take too well to him, including Mr. Barba. Well, to be fair Sonny always looked the less put out whenever the quips about mustaches or night school came from Mr. Barba. If he didn’t know better he would say the man liked to hear those things aimed at him from the lawyer, but he did know better. The detective was probably just relieved Mr. Barba’s tone of voice wasn’t laced with a cutting undertone.

Which was weird.

Mr. Barba was usually the most cutting of them all.

Very weird indeed

**_Every morning the same big and little words_ **

  
  


During the next year, Fred grew accustomed to Sonny’s presence and soon he was just as familiar to him as the rest of his co-workers, but that didn’t mean he stopped noticing things. He noticed how the rest of the gang (or squad if he was trying to speak correctly instead of using his stupid made-up names) slowly started to open up and let the detective in. He noticed how Sonny learned to match Mr. Barba’s jabs with quick witty responses of his own. And he noticed some other things he wasn’t sure he was supposed to be noticing. Things like long looks and dimpled smiles that always left him feeling a little warmer inside just from being able to witness them, even if from afar.

Tonight he noticed something different though, for the first time Sonny and Mr. Barba were alone at the bar. When they walked in Fred thought, with almost giddy excitement, that the two men had finally figured out what everyone else who saw them interacting already knew. He was honored they had chosen Forlini’s as the place for their first date so he took a quick break to go into the staff room looking for the candle Jannet had given him for Secret Santa and he kept forgetting to take home. After all, providing a romantic setting for the date of two of his most loyal customers was the least he could do.

Unfortunately by the time Fredrick came back with the candle in hand ready to light it he was faced with both men sitting at the bar stools with multiple files open in front of them.

Right not a date then.

He was about to turn back to go put the candle back where he found it (he really needed to take it home at some point) when Sonny called him.

“Hey, Fred where were you man? The new guy doesn’t know our orders” he says jokingly pointing at the new hiring he was supposed to be training who in turn looks at them like a deer caught in headlights.

“Don’t worry I got it” he tried to set the candle down without being too obvious about it but it’s clear he failed his goal when Mr. Barba stops writing and narrows his eyes at the offending object.

“Why are you holding a candle?”

_ Because I thought you were on a date and I’m a hopeless romantic who just wants you to be happy _

“Humm, no reason,” he says instead “It’s a gift actually. Yeah I was bringing it here so I don’t forget to take it home”

“And you remembered that in the middle of your shift?” Mr. Barba continues his questioning sounding equal parts confused and amused.

Damn lawyers and all their questions why couldn’t he just buy Fred’s bullshit excuse, now he has to think of something credible to tell them or this will become very awkward very soon got

“It’s cause I received it today just before you guys arrived,” the trainee, now standing next to him, opens his mouth to call him out on his lie but Fredrick quickly steps on his foot and all that comes out is a little pained sound before he shuts up again “And I had left it in the back but then got scared of forgetting it. So I went to pick it up”

Makes total sense. Fred hoped Mr. Barba would drop the subject so he could go back to work. He has a stellar record on not making a fool of himself and he’s not about to ruin it for some misunderstanding.

Mr. Barba seems convinced enough with his explanation, or maybe he realized he had way more important things to do than analyze Frederick’s weird behaviors. Either way, Fred thanks all the angels above that he didn’t suffer any major embarrassment.

He’s already reaching for the drinks to serve them when Sonny, who had been silently watching the conversation evolve, asked another question Fred really didn’t felt like answering.

“Your birthday is not for another 4 months, why are you receiving a gift?”

Fuck.

Damn detectives.

Fredrick does his best to control his facial expressions so they don’t give away too much of the panic he’s feeling. It’s the last time he tries to do something nice for other people, his thoughtful gesture is bringing him more problems than what it’s worth

“Oh it was from my boyfriend, it’s our three-month anniversary” 

It’s a complete lie, the last time he went on a date was so long ago he probably still had some milk teeth.

“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” Sonny says at the same time Mr. Barba mumbles under his breath “Who gives a candle to a significant other?”

Before he can answer either of them Sonny turns to his side finally shifting his attention away from Fred.

“Don’t be rude, the thought is what matters”

He leaves them discussing what is and what isn’t an appropriate gift to offer your boyfriend and if he notices Mr. Barba scribbling down on his notepad some of the things Sonny said he personally liked when the other man goes to use the restroom, well then that’s for him to know and for Sonny to find out. 

Eventually.

Hopefully, before Fred retires.

**_I walk through your dreams and invent the future._ **

  
  


Today was not a happy day. In fact, the last couple of weeks had been a conjunct of shitty days. Fred knows he shouldn’t be so affected by what happened to Mr. Barba. It was non of his business and besides, it wasn’t like the guy was going to prison. But after seeing the same people every other week for a good number of years a guy gets attached. It’s not like Fredrick doesn’t have friends of his own, he just happened to take a liking to this group of badass people who never fail to amaze him.

During the trial, the mood at the bar had been somber and gloomy every time the squad decided to go there. They wouldn’t stay for more than an hour and Mr. Barba would never be with them. Instead, he would come a few hours later, sit at a booth by himself and nurse a glass of scotch while ignoring the constant ringing of his phone.

Fred ended up setting a google alert on the man’s name because  _ “has the jury decided if Mr.Barba is a murderer yet?” _ wasn’t a question he particularly felt like asking anyone but his phone.

When the verdict finally came Fred expected things to slowly go back to their normal course but now, 3 weeks after the fact, Mr. Barba had completely disappeared having been replaced by a new ADA the Fredrick refused to learn the name off out of spite. Maybe replaced was too strong of a word because the man had taken nothing but Mr. Barba’s job. Every time he came into the bar looking for a member of the squad the air would get tense and the exchanges were always brief. 

And then there was Sonny. He would come in almost every day, at different times, ask for a beer and sit on the same stool facing the door for hours on end. Fredrick knew what he was waiting for or rather who, but it was getting a little depressing and Fred felt like he needed to say something. He couldn’t stand to see the man so sad, it wasn’t right.

So he gathered the courage to go prying into other people’s business and approached Sonny. The man must have sensed his presence, quickly turning his face from the front entrance and giving him a small smile that was miles away from his usual grinning expression. 

“Sorry Fed, do you need the seat?” he asks but makes no move to stand, and while it’s not exactly good for the bar to have a seat taken for the whole night while only selling a beer Frederick doesn’t have the heart to tell him that.

“No, you’re cool Sonny I just wanted to ask if you’re okay, you know, with everything that happened”   


“You know what happened?” he replies with a frown and Fred can feel his cheeks heating up at being caught in his interest of people who only know his name cause he serves them alcohol. He’s still trying to come up with an excuse that doesn’t border on stalker behavior when Sonny speaks again, “Stupid question, of course you know, it was all over the news”

Right the news. He’ll just roll with that.

“Yeah, so how are you holding up?”

The surprise on his face makes Fred think no one has bothered to ask him that question in a long time, especially concerning this matter. But it was only logic, Sonny clearly cared for Mr. Barba, and the same was true the other way around as could be seen by the long glances filled with longing they aimed at each other when they thought no one was seeing. But Fred always noticed and it was getting harder and harder to not knock their heads together and demand they talked about their feelings. It was like watching the world slowest romance movie without a fast-forward button to the happily ever after.

“You know what? I’m not doing so well. I miss Barba and it’s like everyone just expects me to be over it already, to  _ stop sulking  _ but I can’t and I don’t understand how they think I’m capable of just forget everything that happened, everything we went through. It’s like they think I have a reset switch or maybe they’re all just better at getting over goodbyes and separations than me” he pauses, looking at Fredrick with wide eyes filled with emotion before casting his eyes down once more “But what sucks the most is that I didn’t have a goodbye, I wasn’t worth so much on the scale, had to hear from Liv that the guy i- that Barba was leaving without looking back. So I keep coming here and waiting for him to show up even if I have no idea what I would say if I saw him. Fuck I’m rambling, aren’t I? Sorry to unload all this on you Fred, I think I should just go home” 

Every other bartender at the bar would have offered a sympathetic smile, bid goodbye, and walk away ready to serve the next customer but not Fred. Because Fred always got “too invested” and “cared too much” for things no one else lost sleep over. He couldn’t even begin to explain why he was so resolute in helping set things right between the two men but after watching them interact for so many years while waiting to see when they would finally act on their feelings for each other, he couldn’t let things end like this. 

Well, his mother always did say soap operas were his favorite tv genre because his DNA was half hopeless romantic half drama queen, so his investment shouldn’t come as a surprise.

“You should call him” Sonny had put on his coat and was fishing for the scarf he had tucked in his pocket earlier when Fredrick broke out of his inner soul-searching and spoke again “Mr. Barba that is, you should call him. Tell him the things you just told me, it might be a good place to start”

“I’m not sure he wants to listen to it” the dejected look on his face suggesting he had devoted a lot of time to that particular train of thought. 

"You'll never know if you don't try it" Sonny doesn't question Fred's eagerness to offer unsolicited advice and for that he's thankful, it's not something he ever wants to explain out loud, how the building relationship between two people who barely know him gives him hope. 

"You know what maybe you're right" 

He sits back down with the frown on his face lifting a bit and reaches for his phone that had been lying forgotten on top of the table for the past hours. 

As Fred prepares to tend to some college kids who just made their way into the bar he can't help but hear the beginning of the conversation with Sonny sounding happy in a long time, his smile making its way into his voice. 

"Hey, it's Sonny, do you think we can talk?" 

**_Let me do it right for once_ **

  
  


The first time Fred sees Mr. Barba after the whole mess with the trial he's holding Forlini's door open for Sonny to get in. He immediately has to turn away so no one catches the stupid smile that appears on his face, busying himself with washing some beer mugs until he has scolded his expression into something more proper. Which doesn’t mean he stops smiling because watching these two finally have a date is almost more exciting than when he found out his favorite ship was canon.

And yes this time Fred is 100% sure it’s a date judging from the way they sit next to each other in one of the back tables, touching from shoulder to knee, with bright eyes and rose-colored cheeks. Too bad he ended up taking that one candle home.

He has their drinks ready before they can order and brings them to the table even tho he’s supposed to be at the bar. 

“Good evening gentlemen” he places the beer and the whiskey down but they barely spare a glance towards him, too occupied with staring at each other, only mumbling thanks after a few seconds when they notice Fredrick hasn’t moved from their table.

Fred would find it a bit rude if he wasn’t so busy swooning at how fucking adorable it was. There was something to be said about seeing a badass criminal prosecutor like Mr. Barba blushing because a cute guy held his hand and kissed his cheek.

As much as he would like to pull up a chair and watch the rest of their date like it was Netflix’s newest romantic comedy he had to finish his shift.

Besides, that would be creepy, very stalker-y.

But mainly his shift, that was the biggest impediment.

And so he went back to work but took every opportunity to sneak a peek at the lovebirds. 

When at hour 2 of their date Sonny reached for Mr. Barba’s face and kissed him Fred gasped so loudly he had to fake a coughing fit right after to distract his coworker from the fact that he was obsessed with someone else’s relationship.

When at hour 3 of their date Fred passed near them on his way to the kitchen and hear a bit of the quiet exchange of words he almost coos out loud. (It’s something along the lines of “Why do you keep calling me soleado? What does that mean?)

When at hour 5 of their date they ask for the check Fred says it’s on the house and when he’s met with two questioning looks he smiles and says “The satisfaction of finally seeing you two figuring things out is enough of a payment.”

“I can see why you say you like him, you’re both giant saps,” Mr. Barba says in what Fred is sure is meant to be a snarking tone but that ends up sounding soft and amused.

“Shut up Rafi, Fred’s just being sweet”

Yes sweet. he did not spend the last two hours working up the courage to say those few words to Sonny and Mr. Barba. Absolutely not. Because that would be weird. It was just a momentary decision. A sweet one apparently.

When at the final moments of their date the couple goes outside to wait for their taxi Fred turns away from the window to let them have a bit of privacy because as much as he would love to soak in every interaction between the two he also wants them to feel like it’s only them in the whole wide world, even if just for a moment.

It’s what they deserve after all.

**_This doesn’t look that much different from home_ **

Mr. Barba is freaking out. He had a notepad opened in front of him but instead of writing legal summations or whatever it is lawyers write he was simply staring at it. Maybe staring wasn’t the right word, it was more like he was glaring at it as if he could intimidate the piece of paper into giving him the answers he was looking for.

But what really showed Fred that the usual put together prosecutor was not in his right state of mind was what he ordered as soon as he got into the bar.

A beer.

Mr. Barba. Ordering a beer.

Never in all the years, he had worked there had he witnessed such an occurrence. It just wasn’t natural.

Now over an hour later, the beer rested half full and forgotten at the edge of the table, all his attention focusing on the still empty page. Fred was deciding if it was a good idea to approach him and ask if everything was alright when Mr. Barba turned around to face him with a desperate look in his eyes, almost knocking the beer bottle into the ground.

“You”

“Me?” Fred looks around to make sure he’s the one being addressed. 

“Yes, you. You’re a romance person right?” 

The question is weird in about ten different types of ways, varying from Mr. Barba wanting to talk about his love life to Mr. Barba wanting to discuss it with him. Winning the lottery seemed more likely than this turn of events up until a few minutes ago, but he’s still staring helplessly at Fred so he does his best to answer seriously.

“Humm sure I guess you could say that. Why do you need help romancing Sonny? I can give you a few tips.”

Well, mostly seriously.

The annoyed expression he was expecting to meet after his joke doesn’t appear, instead, Mr. Barba looks almost embarrassed. (Fred thinks he can see the tip of his ears turning red, and it’s quite possible one of the cutest things he’s ever seen in his whole 24 and a half years of life)

“I may need some pointers on something.”

Fred must have let some of the excitement he was feeling upon being asked by Mr. Barba to help with something show on his face because he was quickly gifted with a trademark eye-roll. He briefly wondered if this was what Sonny felt every time the lawyer requested his opinion regarding a case. Judging by the beaming smile that never failed to appear on the younger man’s face it probably was.

“Is it related to whatever you’ve been trying to write for god knows how long in that notebook of yours?” he had to admit he was pretty curious about where the conversation was heading.

“Ah, you noticed that” he looked down at the table at the offending object as if it was the sole responsible for all his misery.

“I notice a lot of things, you would be surprised” 

“Well yes you see I’m going to propose to Sonny”

Fredrick will forever deny that his reaction upon hearing those words included a high-pitched scream that would put teenage girls to shame and dropping all his work at the spot to sit in the seat next to Mr. Barba. That doesn’t mean it didn’t happen exactly like that.

“Tell me everything.”

“Oh god, what did I do?” the rhetorical question was mumbled laced with what could only be described as regret.

Thankfully Fred was a master at ignoring those kinds of remarks but he still felt the need to apologize, the last thing he wanted was to be another stress factor.

“I’m sorry I’ll tune it down. But tell me what can I do to help?”

“I’m trying to write my speech but it’s just not working. I even ordered a beer to align myself with Sonny and, I don’t know, receive some of his ability to be romantic”

“Okay first of all I don’t think our beer has telepathic properties so that may not be the way to go. Second, you said you’re trying to write a speech?”

"Yes, is that- you think it's a bad idea?" 

“No, I just sort of think it’s easier to speak from the heart you know? Just tell him you love him and why you want to marry him, the words will come. Although if you want my honest opinion you could just throw the ring box at Sonny and he would still say yes.” Not that he could blame, if a man that looked like that came anywhere near Fred with a ring he would drag his ass to the nearest courthouse.

“That’s surprisingly good advice, thank you, Fredrick.”

He stood up gathering his things and Fred followed suit ignoring the nasty glare his coworker was sending his way in favor of accompanying the man to the door.

“My pleasure Mr. Barba.”

“You can call me Rafael.”

The happiness at being allowed to call the prosecutor by his given name slowed his ability to processes everything else the man had said so his words took a few extra seconds to fully register in his brain.

“Wait did you said surprisingly?”

Mr- No, Rafael’s smirk was the last thing he saw before he disappeared inside a taxi parked nearby.

**_Let’s jump ahead to the moment of epiphany_ **

The next morning the bar was closed for the day, Monday was their restock and deep cleaning day so when Fred heard the door open he quickly raised his head from behind the counter where he previously had been organizing the bar's beer supply. 

"Sorry we're clo-" he stopped mid-sentence when he saw who his visitors were. 

Sonny and Rafael walked further in hand in hand, wearing matching smiles. 

"We were hoping you could open an exception to your favorite customers" it was Sonny who spoke first, accompanying the words with a dimpled smile that Fred still thought was cuter than any grown men had any right to be. 

"I'm always happy to have you just don't tell the others you're my favorites, they would never forgive me. Can I get you anything to drink? We're low on everything except tap water" 

"No need Fredrick, we just passed by to tell you something" This time it was Mr. Barba who spoke reaching into his jacket and taking out a folded piece of paper.

"Oh, what is it, Mr. Barba?" 

"Thought I told you to call me Rafael" 

"Right sorry is just that you sounded a lot like my principal when he said he needed to have a word with me, not my fondest memories" 

"Besides soon he will be Mr. Barba-Carisi and while I personally love the name I understand it can be a bit of a mouthful" 

Sonny's words take a second to sink in, his eyes going wide, causing the two men to let out a chuckle at his reaction.

“Wait does that mean that you-” he points at Rafael who simply smirks and nods “And you said-” he turns his hand a little so it points at Sonny who gives a nod of his own along with a beaming smile.

“Wow this is so awesome, congratulations I’m so happy for you,” he said with a smile of his own, “I knew you could do it” 

“You were of great help and that is why we wanted to give you this” Rafael handed him the piece of paper he was still holding.

It was a simple notebook page, very similar to the one that had antagonized Rafael the night before. What was written in it almost brought tears to Fred’s eyes.

_ Sonny Carisi and Rafael Barba would like to invite you to their wedding _

He was too stunned to speak so after a few moments of silence Sonny broke it.

“Of course you will get an actual invitation when we do those but it felt right to invite you in the first place. We kinds wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.”

“Don’t say that of course, you would. Just maybe in a few more years, I only sped things along, I’m not getting any younger and it was clear that if we followed your timeline you would both be senior citizens by the time you got there.”

“I wish I could say you were wrong”

All three laughed at Fred’s remark and Rafael’s and if he started to think of a way to get a spot on the wedding toasts just so he could crack that joke in front of a bigger audience, well then that’s for him to know.


End file.
